quarantine made me do it

whoa,  okay so it’s been a long time since i’ve posted on here. (like 2 years) i’m kinda sad that i don’t blog or even really write much anymore, but since i’m bored out of my mind i figured why not post on here? (i know i’m like super irrelevant and most of you don’t even remember me & i have no clue what’s going on in the blog community, but bear with me).

since all of you are sO invested in my life, here’s what i’ve been doing this quarantine.

  • having existential crises. (crisises? crisi? criseiescies?)
  • ordered some new clothes which i realize isn’t really that smart in the midst of a global pandemic, but oh well.
  • having zoom calls with every person on the planet
  • spending an unhealthy amount of time on tiktok (and i still can’t dance)
  • baking
  • working out (to make myself feel less bad about eating everything I bake)

also, i went through some of my recent posts and i just CAN’T believe i wrote those AND that anyone read any of it. i’m not sure i can bring myself to go back to my 2016 posts. yikes.

I started a new blog over here if you’d like to follow. (who am I kidding? no one’s reading this.)

i hope all you guys have been staying safe and healthy. ❤ lmk what you’ve been up to!


reputation world tour recap

JUNE 1, 2018



this queen made her entrance, and i was so not …ready for it. the stadium felt like holy ground. it was the best of times, the worst of crimes, she struck a match and blew my mind…

so it goes…

i was screaming long live all the magic we made, the walls we crashed through, because i had the time of my life fighting dragons with tay….

call it what you want, but i’ll salute to her, ’cause she’s my american queen. she’s so gorgeous, i couldn’t say anything to her face.

she has a big reputation, aaaaaaaaaaaa.

i didn’t wanna wear my jacket even though it was F R E E Z I N G. (but not cold as you.) idk why, i know i did something bad, but it just felt so good.  

she might be queen of my heart, but she’s also just a girl trying to find a place in this world.

she is sensible, and SO incredible, and all you haters are jealous…

i felt like the lucky one when she came on the c stage. she was so close, i was enchanted…
i’m not one for dancing, but for her i did. all i did was shake, shake, shake, shake it off! 

wow, she’s got style. look at that dress! (even though she only bought it so you could take it off)

stay beautiful, and know that you have a perfectly good heart, tay. we like you for you. ❤

it’s so magical, almost delicate, to think that i’ve been here, in her presence. isn’t it? isn’t it? isn’t it?

she made this night feel like wonderland, with all the flashing lights. she blew us one last kiss, and suddenly we were out of the woods. i wish i could call taylor and tell her how i’m only me when i’m with her, but she couldn’t come to the phone.

don’t blame me, tay made me crazy…at the end of the concert, i was crying on the staircase, begging her please don’t go….it was treacherous to say goodbye, but i truly had the best day.  this night was something out of one of my wildest dreams. tay, although i wish you would have invited me to the rep room, this love is something that will never die. (even though the old taylor did) i want to make sure you know, i will remember this all too well. ❤


recent readings (featuring rutvi rants™️)

gday to all! i know a lot of you enjoy book reviews, so today’s post will be a mix of all the books i’ve recently read and my thoughts on them. be warned, book rants ahead.

currently reading: numbers by rachel ward.

Numbers (Numbers, #1)
*image taken from goodreads*

summary: jem lives with a curse- whenever she looks someone in the eye, she sees a date on their forehead-the day they will die. jem isolates herself to avoid the awfulness of her situation, but she meets Spider, and they plan a trip to the city. as they explore, jem finds that each of the tourists has the same number-the current day. they are all destined to die…unless they escape. but which of the consequences will be worse?

opinion: i’m not done with it yet, but so far it’s pretty action packed. i like the idea of the book and i find it interesting, but at the same time a little hard to follow. also, i don’t like jem at all. she’s kind of a whiny brat, and if i knew her in real life, she wouldn’t be someone i’d want to be friends with. also, she can barely go two sentences without swearing. i mean seriously, page 7 and i already see a “fork off” (except she didn’t really say fork ya know). occasional swears are okay in a book, okay for a character who is mad or upset. but if they’re there over and over again, it’s repetitive and unnecessary. it’s like jem didn’t know how to talk to people other than telling them to fork off. also, her and spider’s romance- ugh. really? it was cliche and just plain stupid. honestly, i’m getting reallllly tired of the ‘girl falls in love with best guy friend’ scenario in books. if you’re going to write romance (which was also UNNECESSARY) into an action novel, AT LEAST THINK OF SOMETHING CREATIVE! AND DON’T TEACH YOUNG READERS STUPID EXPECTATIONS AND THINGS ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS! also why does jem feel the need to clarify that spider was black every two seconds? (in the beginning of the book) like i get it jem, calm down. i won’t abandon this book, but only because i want to see how it ends. (without reading spoilers)  i will NOT be reading the sequel.

book: willow by julia hoban


*taken from goodreads*

summary: willow’s parents ask their daughter to drive them home after drinking too much wine, but the rain made willow lose control of her car, killing her parents. then willow resorts to cutting herself, and then yay! guy saves the day!

opinion: okay, if you can’t tell from the halfhearted summary, i did not like this book at all. in fact, i disliked it so much that i decided it needed a terrible summary to match its terrible content. buckle up, i have a lot to say about this book. first of all, i don’t even know why i checked it out. the summary on the back made it seem boring, the cover was ugly (we all judge books by their covers, don’t deny it) and looked like it had been made on pic collage, and it looked like it had never been checked out before. i managed to read the whole thing, and while i was reading it, i was like “oh okay, it’s not horrible! i’m intrigued!” but i also couldn’t help feeling like i was doing something wrong the whole time i was reading it. after reading what other people thought about it, i realized why i felt so horrible and found that i 100% agreed with them saying that willow was totally ungrateful, and guy (yes, that is his name) didn’t seem to understand that if willow was cutting, he should have TOLD SOMEONE, even if willow told him not to. and the romance- oh my god, please. “i’ll be your lover now, willow. those razors can’t be your lover anymore.” GUY. PLEASE DO US A FAVOR AND GO. AWAY. as “charming” as he may be, he can’t cure depression, and he is certainly not a replacement for her parents. the last thing willow needs while she’s feeling so guilty and awful is a boyfriend. guy really seems like a nice…well…guy, and it was sweet that he wanted to help, but honestly, how did he know he was going to fall in love with willow JUST BECAUSE SHE HELPED A GIRL IN THE SCIENCE LAB? stalker much?? willow is portrayed as a helpless girl who was like: “oh poor me, pity me, i cut myself, i need someone to save me” and guy is like “I’LL SAVE YOU PRINCESS DON’T WORRY JUST LISTEN TO ME I’LL FIX EVERYTHING!” falling in love with someone doesn’t take away their depression, and stopping cutting isn’t something that’s easy to do. also, the fact that willow cuts was the whole basis for the book, and i feel like the way the author wrote about it wasn’t accurate. willow treated cutting like a hobby, or something to do when minor things went wrong. here were some of the things she said: “i’m very systematic with my cutting, i take precautions to make sure they don’t get infected, i cut because i have to, oh don’t worry, i only cut on my arms” and it was just so WRONG. it’s not easy to talk about it, so how it’s a common discussion topic for her and guy is strange. i get that she was feeling extremely guilty. i understand that it can lead to depression and even this extremity of cutting yourself. but the way cutting was portrayed, even for someone who doesn’t know much about it, was just really annoying and wrong. willow needs therapy or some other help, not a boyfriend.

i think that’s it. i really hated this book. words can’t describe how TERRIBLE it is.

book: snow flower and the secret fan by lisa see

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan

*taken from goodreads*

summary: set in 19th century china, a girl named lily and a girl named snow flower are paired together as ‘old sames’, otherwise referred to as laotongs. as the years pass by, the girls become women and grow closer and closer together, embroidering together, sending each others letters written in nu shu (a secret language used by women, away from the influence of men) on fans, sharing their joys and tragedies of motherhood and arranged marriages. their bond seems unbreakable- until a misunderstanding threatens to take away everything they’ve had together.

opinion: this is a pretty obscure book, but i just loved it. seriously, it was one of the best books i’ve read in a while. it’s not something i would have seen myself reading, but i ended up looooving it. to start: don’t get me wrong, romance is great. and there was a little bit in this. but that’s part of what made this book so good- the plot wasn’t completely focused on romance. it taught me a lot about china in the 1800s, and how laotongs work, what they are, and how they show the beauty of friendship between women. snow flower had really good themes, was incredibly sad at some parts, but incredibly pure and beautiful at others. if i had any emotions, i probably would have sobbed my eyes out- and that’s how you know it’s a good book. i loved the characters (snow flower could be a bit annoying sometimes but in in the end, she’s pretty great), too. i hated the idea of footbinding and the mindset of “if a woman can’t have sons, both she and the daughter are worthless”, but those aren’t problems with the book, they’re problems with history. i also loved  learning about nu shu and the idea of a secret language developed by women. i loved that the friendship between snow flower and lily was more important than any of the romance. this book was so unique and interesting, and it’s by far one of the best, most informational, beautifully written, historical fiction books i’ve ever read.

thank you so much for reading! at 1347 words, i think that’s enough for today. 😛

love always,

rutvi ❤


P.P.S. 1389 words.

P.P.P.S. okay, i’m done now. byeeee. ❤


there’s somethin’ ’bout the way the street looks when it’s just rained….




there’s a glow on the pavement…..



hello, hello! forgive me for being an AWFUL excuse for a blogger- this is my first post this month. track, soccer, gymnastics has been taking up most of my time, and, of course, my history teacher thinks i have no life, so she gave me 59876543567309487528901 assignments. yay! now the school year is coming to a close, and i will have more time to post over the summer. oh my gosh, i can’t believe i’m graduating and moving on to- gulp-high school. yikes.

the title of this post is a line from taylor swift’s song fearless, in honor of my first (hopefully of many) taytay concert coming up soon!! I AM SO EXCITEDDDDDD. sam got to see it before me, and i’m super jealous.
the first few pictures show some of the flowers in our garden in sunlight, and the rest are how they look after it’s rained. though flowers are always pretty (even when they’re dead), i love the look of rain on flowers, and the scent in the air after rain falls. i think rain makes everything a little more beautiful. also, i love redbud trees??? they’re SO gorgeous. ♥

life updates:

-i beat my personal record in the 100m dash in track! originally my time was around 15.29 seconds, and then it was 14.69, and then in a relay i ran it in 13.94 seconds!!

-speaking of track, i got to go to an invite-only meet on thursday, but the FrEaKiNg seventh grade soccer team took the bus without us, so we ended up missing four races. bleh. thanks a lot, sevvies.

-i’ve been binge watching the great british baking show a LOT recently, i just finished the second season. no joke, i watched for 5 hours straight yesterday. i think i have too much free time. which i could have spent blogging but….

-my birthday’s next sunday! yay, aging.

-i was chosen as a finalist to give a speech at graduation! i’ll find out if i got it tomorrow….i’ll update y’all.


-i have some new art, i’ll get it posted at some point in my life.

– i need stranger things season three RIGHT NOW. seriously, how can we wait until 2019??

-CLUB PENGUIN IS BACK, MY DOODS. it’s really funny because it’s unblocked on our school chromebooks, so everyone made an account and plays it in class. plus, most of the people on there are my age, which is great and goes to show how immature we all are. XD my favorite part of it is going to crowded places and screaming “WHO LIKES PANIC! AT THE DISCO?!” and friending whoever says “ME” and tells me their favorite song. (btw if you wanna make an account, go to clubpenguinonline!!! my username is sptsptspgoot)

-i kind of want to learn how to play ukelele. it sounds really cool. (loren, want to teach me?)

-i literally am the dumbest person ever. i accidentally put salt in my mom’s coffee, asked a girl IN MY MATH CLASS what period she had math, AND fell up AND down the stairs all in one day. no exaggeration.

also, happy mother’s day! make sure to thank your lovely mothers for bringing you into the world. 🙂


rutvi ❤

730 starry nights ago….

730 starry nights ago, i sat on my couch, jetlagged from spring break, eager to share some of my photos from vacation with the world. my personal site, originally called so sugar sweet (why? don’t ask. i don’t really have an answer.) was born that day, and has grown to become the blog you all know as capturing and creating.  i’m happy to announce that on march 27th, 2018, i hit TWO YEARS OF BLOGGING!

this is so beyond amazing and i can’t believe it’s already been that long! blogging has changed so much for me, and here are just a few:

  1. photography! i never thought this would be something i’m into, but thanks to starting this blog i’ve realized how much i love taking pictures and i’ve gotten better at it.
  2.  internet friends: this is probably the best part of being a blogger: the community. i was fortunate to be sorta adopted into a circle of wonderful friendly bloggers as soon as i started my blog, and even more lucky to have met one of them in real life! i love the sites that tie us all together, even though we all live thousands of miles apart.
  3. music: i’ve found so many new artists, bands, etc. to listen to thanks to all these blogs! (i’m looking at you, loren and mckenzie.)
  4. thinking more in depth about books. doing book reviews forces me to think deeper about what i read instead of just saying “it was good” or “it was bad.”
  5. i’m more tech-savvy! before i had my site, if you asked me to upload pictures somewhere, i would have turned purple and panicked. (not at the disco, though.)

now while all these are great, i know you guys probably want some stats. sooooooo:


views: 12535 (throughout the last 2 years)

comments: 2418 (throughout the last 2 years)

posts: 188 (!!!!)

the top commenters are christina creativity, samantha, loren, and mya!

(it’s 11:11, gotta make a wish!)

i’ve been thinking that i kind of want to change up the design of my blog a little bit, because while i love the pink, i think i want something a little more professional-looking? if that makes sense? i’m trying to make my blog less of a “post whenever, post whatever” kind of blog. those aren’t a bad thing, but i like the idea of having a site that has a theme reflects my personality now. i also want to clear up my site a bit- this does mean i’ll be deleting some posts, (don’t worry, just the truly embarrassing ones like my failed challenges and other things like that.)

also, i don’t know how to celebrate my blogiversary, since i can’t do giveaways, so if you guys have any ideas i’d love if you shared them with me. 🙂

thank you to my followers and readers, to my parents for letting me go on this journey of blogging, and to my the best internet friends i could ask for. i love you all. 🙂


rutvi ❤

france/italy trip

bonjour, everyone! i’ve been away on spring break for the last week, and now i’m back and ready to share some pictures. 🙂 my family & i, along with some family friends, went to france & then italy for a day, and let me tell you, it was aMaZiNg. i have a ton of pictures, so buckle your seatbelt & prepare to be transported to the land of baguettes!

day one: this was thee day we landed. as soon as we got to the hotel, i changed out of my sweats from the flight into an actual outfit (complete with ripped tights because i’m clumsy & have no idea how they ripped!) then we went in search of food. being vegetarian in a country like france really narrows down the choices for food, so we ended up having italian food basically every day, which wasn’t a problem for me, because i looooove pasta.

food review: eh. tasteless. but good when salt, pepper, & cheese are added.

we then went down to the beach (my shoes got soaked) and took some photos there.

idk whose dog this is, but it’s frickin adorable. i took a lot of photos of random dogs….

ft. my brother^^ we don’t actually like each other thaaat much, we’re just posing. XD

probably the best part of the day: gelato! i got stracciatella (i spelled this without looking at google, convinced myself it was wrong because wordpress underlined it, googled it, and found it it was right all along.)



this is called promenade. this photo was taken by my dad, but still so. prettyyyyyyyy.

day 2: woke up and had part of a fresh baguette for breakfast. it was so good!! to be honest the bread is probably what i miss most about france. today we went on a day trip to monaco & stopped in a couple other cities.

pretty tower near our hotel^^

we went to a perfume factory! it was super cool, and these lil’ duckies are adorable.

i loved seeing these open markets, it’s so different from a grocery store.

presenting the best photo taken on this trip: my brother as rose from titanic.

these artsy doors were everywhere!!

day 3: we went on a 4-hour e-bike tour of nice! my favorite thing i did was riding downhill on the fastest bike setting. almost crashed a few times, but hey, it was worth it. with 16 people (we had a BIG group) all biking together, you can expect a couple accidents…

i don’t have any photos of me biking, because, hello, dangerous! but here are some pictures from a really scenic place we stopped at:

after the tour, we had a picnic lunch of pasta & really good bread. the pasta even had little bike-shaped noodles, which was an adorable touch.

we also went to a candy factory! it was a really cool experience, and i got some pretty sweet (i’m sorry) stuff like rose jam & chocolate bars with flower bits in them. we also celebrated a friend’s birthday with a really tasty tropeziénne cake. let it be known that in our friend group, no one’s birthday is complete without everyone putting gobs of frosting on their face. 😛

we visited a beautiful cathedral in the evening, and these bunnies were outside:

day 4: we spent some time in the morning taking pictures in a park.

we shopped for a bit, then ate lunch and some pastries. i had a madeleine, which was unexpectedly lemony, but so soft and yummy. after that, we visited the promenade (see day one) to take pictures in the water, which i refused to do. a lot of people were crouching down to take photos, and while the fountains looked pretty cool from that angle, i couldn’t figure out why so many photographers were doing that. then i realized you could see the reflection of some buildings & trees in the water, which looks breathtakingly beautiful!

while we were there, a really nice woman let us per her dog, a little yorkie. it got my whiite shirt all dirty from its paws, but it was so sweeeet and tinyyyy and cuddlyyyy asdfghjkl!!

we found a guy who was doing some amazing art with spray paint, so we watched him work. you’d think paintings like his would take a long time, but he was actually incredibly fast! i bought the painting i saw him make. that’ll be for another post, though. after that, we relaxed by the beach & got gelato. we went back to the city we went to on day 2 in the evening to take some photos.

day 5: we had planned to go to venice for a day, but kept going back and forth as to whether we should or not, since it would be raining. we decided to go anyway, and it was one of the highlights of the whole trip! we took a speedboat & had some amazing pasta for lunch. sadly, we didn’t go on any gondola rides because of the rain. our hotel room was the cutest, it’s kind of a shame we only stayed one day.


i wore french braids in italy. only me. :’)

i kept teasing my friend and calling her georgie because she was wearing a yellow raincoat, like the kid from IT. the fact that it was raining made it even funnier. XD we saw the bridge of sighs & and the realto bridge, both of which were amazing spots to take pictures! my brother & i also recreated this picture from the last time we went to venice: (ughhhh., both blogger & wordpress are being salty. i’ll upload the pic later, i promise)

we stayed out super late that night, but gahhh it was worth it. oh, and my friend and i got matching olive green sweatshirts that said ‘university of venice’ on them as our souvenir. it’s a long story, but it’s kinda our “tradition” to get university sweatshirts on vaca.

day 6: time to leave venice! 😦

if we look like we’re in extreme pain, that’s because we were. the sun was going directly in our eyes.

here’s some shots from the speedboat! the one just above this is my favorite. i stood outside for half of the ride, taking pictures, but soon i got cold and went back in. 😛

we took a plane back to france, and we had REALLY GOOD thai food for lunch. i got pad thai for the first time, and i loved it so much i forgot to take a photo of it. (question of the day: how do you pronounce thai? like ‘tie’, or like “THai”?) 

i saw this adorable chair & table set outside a jewelry shop, and instantly knew i had to take a photo there. so i went with my ice cream, and here is the result: 

(lavender flavored gelato, btw)

the shop owner was staring at me and saying something in french that i couldn’t understand. :/ i also dropped my ice cream when i was walking back to where my parents were sitting! miraculously, i caught it and didn’t have to get a new one.

we went souvenir shopping for the boys in the group. they wanted some really specific hat, and they were being really annoying and picky about the ones that were in shops. we also went to the flower market, where i proceeded to take pictures of every bouquet i saw:

^^ this one was just lovely. ❤

that night, all the kids played a card game called mao. it’s the most frustrating & hilarious game ever.

day 7: our last day! noooooooo!

we checked out an art museum in the morning. on the way there, we saw tons of orange trees and this sculpture. so what did i do? i made a meme out of it, of course!

the museum was really interesting and unique, and had some great pieces. we then visited an extremely beautiful monastery. my dad took these photos of me there, and i love how they turned out:

we went to the beach for the last time! another nice dog owner let us pet his doggo. we ended up playing with it for half an hour. he was such a good boy 🙂

interesting happenings/observations:

  • we buried my friend with rocks
  • two of the kids in our group got lost! but don’t worry, we found them.
  • i got locked in a bathroom in italy. a woman had to pick the lock with a knife. it was TERRIFYING.
  • the same kid who got lost misplaced/lost his backpack about 500000 times.
  • i realized how polite and kind everyone is in france!
  • we found a mexican street food stand and i ordered my food in spanish.
  • too many smokers. :/
  • a guy in our group of family friends who is kinda rude to me for no reason purposely knocked into me with his giant backpack. i yelled at him, and this guy who worked at a market who saw the whole thing said, “don’t worry about him, he’s a stupid man.” XD
  •  random people ran into our group pictures. it was pretty funny.
  • SO MANY CUTE DOGGOSSSSS! i’d never seen a poodle before until this trip, and i saw one (in a purse!!) as soon as we landed at the airport.
  • we crashed 3 wedding picture parties. ’twas great.
  • the boys in our group of friends got bored and decided to play a game of ninja in a square (place massena) where lots of people were around. a guy who did tours stopped and watched them play, he was so into it that he went “oof!” every time someone got out and “yes!” when they dodged a hit. XD it was really funny, he seemed disappointed when the game ended.
  • on the last day, a HUGE wave came and started to wash everyone’s stuff away. no one was expecting a wave that big, and some of us had to rush in the water to grab our bags and shoes. everyone & everyone’s stuff (except mine!) was soaked to the core. (my bro had to dry his shoes with a hairdryer.) i was basically the only one that didn’t get wet!


i had such a fun time in france! i miss it, but i’m also happy to be back.  a huge thank you to my dad for planning this amazing trip! 🙂

au revoir,


the change award

hi everyone!! loren nominated me for the change award that gracie created, and i’m super excited to do it! well rutvi if you were so excited why didn’t you do the tag when she tagged you instead of 56708457398 years later  

here are the rules:

– link back to me, as well as whoever nominated you.
– include this: i, gracie chick of a light in the darkness, created this award to highlight the importance of young people taking responsibility for the future of their world. the change award also gives them the opportunity to share with others what they believe in.
answer the questions below.
– nominate as many people as you like.

make a list of the things you want to change about schools.

  • stop grading group projects as a whole. if one person doesn’t do their part, why should my grades drop?
  • please don’t make sex ed so awkward for us. i’m begging you. it isn’t necessary to make us say….words aloud as a class. we know how to say them, we promise.
  • make polar bear running an official sport!!! kids put hard work into running in the freezing weather!
  • now, i understand why we have to take standardized tests for class placement and all. but WHY DO WE HAVE TO STANDARDIZED TESTS THAT DON’T EVEN DETERMINE PLACEMENT?
  • s t o p  m a k i n g  p o i n t l e s s  r u l e s

    make a list of the things you want to change about local communities.

  • this isn’t that big of a deal, but please make girl scout cookies less expensive. $30 for 6 boxes is insane.
  • adults, don’t keep asking middle school kids if they know what they want to be when they’re older. it puts a lot of pressure on us, and the majority of us still have no idea what we want our future occupation to be.
  • @adults again, stop saying “this generation” this and “this generation” that. who raised our generation? your generation. and what is so wrong with us?? technology was made to impact the world. and we don’t just sit around like brainless zombies, contrary to popular belief.

    make a list of the things you want to change about the world, your world.

  • the media is trying to change beauty standards, but they’re doing it the wrong way. they say people should love themselves EVEN THOUGH/DESPITE *insert “flaw” here*. example: oh, i guess i’m pretty, EVEN THOUGH i’m a size 14. NONONONO STOP RIGHT THERE HUNNY. THAT IS NOT SELF LOVE OR BODY POSITIVITY OR WHATEVER YOU WANT TO CALL IT. change that ‘even though’ to BECAUSE. you are beautiful BECAUSE you are a size 14. there we go, that’s better.
  • people have to stop saying “that’s gay” TO THINGS THAT AREN’T EVEN REMOTELY ABOUT LGBTQ+ STUFF.
  • please give us a new president. enough said.
  • g u n   l a w s. please change them. guns aren’t necessary.

    i hope i did this right. i wasn’t sure how to organize some of the things i had to say or which category to put them in, so i just kind of guessed.


samantha @redheadwithabook

mcckenna @alternate galaxy

liv @andlivloves

i’m running out of people, so anyone who’s wearing red right now, consider yourself tagged!

**disclaimer** this post was not made to offend anyone, so i’m truly sorry if you are offended. if you don’t agree with some things i mentioned, kindly say so, but if you can’t, then there’s a very useful button called “close tab”.

much love to all of you. ❤



my tyler joseph paper

The fans roar with excitement. “I LOVE YOU!” a girl screams, and it’s one of the many times he will hear those words tonight.  He grips the microphone, his heart swelling with pride and gratitude. He’s made it. He glances at his drummer and smiles.  Tyler Joseph, lead singer of the band Twenty Øne Pilots, begins to sing.

It isn’t his first time performing a concert, but tonight is just as special, because he knows his lyrics have saved someone’s life.  Tyler Joseph, lyrical genius, grew up in Columbus, Ohio, with his brothers Zack and Jay and his sister Madison.  His love of music began when he dug a keyboard out of his closet and began to sing and compose songs.  Tyler started Twenty Øne Pilots as a band with a few of his high school friends, and released his own EP album called “No Phun Intended”. The name Twenty One Pilots comes from a play Tyler was reading in college called All My Sons, where a man sent out faulty plane parts, and twenty-one pilots died as a result of that. Since TØP was created, drummer Josh Dun has joined the band, and their songs have gained popularity- a few have even gotten to the top of the charts.  Tyler and Josh even wrote a song for the movie Suicide Squad.  But perhaps what people like the most about TØP lyrics is how real they are and how they reflect real problems like mental illnesses. People of all ages can relate to the feelings of hopelessness and depression expressed in Tyler’s songs. These songs assure people that they are not alone in feeling suicidal or depressed, while also providing a sense of hope and a reason to not give up.  Many fans have even said that his music has saved their lives.

Besides Tyler Joseph’s successful music career, he has faced many difficulties along the way, some of which inspired his best and most relatable songs. Tyler Joseph struggles with bipolar disorder, which means he could be happy at one point and then suddenly sink into a deep depression. At 17, he learned that it’s possible to commit suicide by tying a noose to a kitchen sink and leaning forward.  His suicidal feelings took over him, and he attempted to take his life. His suicide attempt is what inspired his song Kitchen Sink, in which he says that a kitchen sink means something different to him than what it means to everyone else. His character “Blurryface” (mentioned in his most recent album) is a representation of his insecurities, as is wearing black paint on his neck and hands.

Tyler Joseph is now happily married & very successful with his music career. Twenty Øne Pilots is set to release a new album later this year.   It is a true blessing that Tyler failed to kill himself, because without him, others who’d contemplated suicide wouldn’t have the sense of hope that Tyler Joseph’s music gives them. “Sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind,” and “Life has a hopeful undertone…” He sings.   Because he knows how it feels to want to end your life, his main goal is to help people get rid of their depression and suicidal thoughts.  Many of his lyrics reassure fans that he is there for them and that they will be alright. Tyler’s songs express the frustration that comes with feeling like the world is against you, but he also stated that the most important part of his career is encouraging his listeners to stay alive.

Twenty Øne Pilots will never be just another “emo” band.  So much time and so many emotions have gone into making this music, and the lyrics are far more meaningful than most assume. Tyler Joseph‒and all fans of Twenty-One Pilots- can’t wait for the next album. The end of the concert is greeted with thunderous applause and whistles. The neon stage lights stop flashing and the clapping is so loud it fills Tyler’s ears and heart. He stands on stage for just a few minutes longer than necessary, thanking each and every one of his fans, for not only has he saved them, but, in a way, they have saved him too.

hi everyone! a lot of you said you wanted to see my paper about tyler joseph, so here it is, completed!  i got an A on it 🙂 it was fun to write and to research, i actually learned a lot. i also was super happy that i could express my love for tøp in my schoolwork. 😛

important: it was loren’s birthday a couple days ago, everyone head over to killjoy and wish her a happy birthday! love you, queen. ❤

love, rutvi ❤ |-/ ❤

michigan photography dump


my family drove up to michigan for the long weekend, and i took a lot of pictures while we were there. however, i did manage to narrow it down to only the really good ones. here they are! 🙂

le old treehouse

(and basically my aunt & uncle’s whole backyard)

can i just say that i was ~s u p e r  f r e a k e d~ to go up this ladder because it’s like 20 years old and the entire floor of the treehouse had been ripped out?

my cardigan kept getting stuck to thorns and branches, so that was fun.
i’m pretty sure this is where i almost fell.
here’s some drab brown trees, but look, BOKEH!
i love treehouses so much.
awwww lookit the squirrel<3
i love this one because you can see the scratches on the wood and the layer of moss that’s starting to grow on it.
99% sure this is a rope that was once used to climb up to the treehouse or get down from there.

that’s what it looks like from under. not really sure how that happened, but yeaaah, i wasn’t about to step in there.

le bagel shop

i had a sundried-tomato bagel. ’twas good.

le graffiti

this was really cool because it was just a little alleyway with a ton of graffiti, and since it makes for interesting pictures, there were a lot of photographers there. i was kind hoping for some more art-like stuff instead of tons of words, but i thought these were cool anyway, so i’m posting them.

yes, that’s gum. yes, it is disgusting. and a little amazing.

one of the photographers started dying of laughter when she saw this. XD
this one was by far my favorite picture i took in that alley, the dripping paint & the word rebel just looks really cool.
i know, i’m wearing a t-shirt and gloves, i’m so hipster. i guess it adds to the gray tones in the picture though. (this isn’t graffiti but it’s art. plus, i don’t have another category ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

i actually love this??

le random

this was really pretty. too bad it didn’t taste as good as it looked…. 

le mist

i was trying to take a picture of the trees outside, but the camera focused on the rain on the windows instead, which actually turned out pretty cool.

ooh, fog.
considering i took these in a moving car, i really like them.

i hope you liked these! favorites?? oh, and congratulations on getting through all that. 😛

rutvi ♥

unknowingly and everywhere.

hi, everyone! a friend recently lent me her copy of milk and honey by rupi kaur, and i loved it a lot. the poems were beautiful and so honest, it actually kind of stung. i really want to read the sun and her flowers (rupi’s next book) now.

here were a couple of my favorite poems:

some people

are so bitter

to them

you must be kindest

i was music

but you had your ears cut off

you were temptingly beautiful

but stung when i got close

your art

is not about how many people

like your work

your art

is about

if your heart likes your work

if your soul likes your work

it’s about how honest

you are with yourself

and you

must never

trade honesty

for relatability




question of the day: hot chocolate or coffee?